Why Some Children Don't Tell: Understanding Barriers to Abuse Disclosure in Schools

Why This Matters

When children experience abuse, speaking out is rarely easy—especially within school settings. Yet timely disclosure is crucial: it can be the first step toward safety, healing, and justice. Schools are often the one place where trusted adults are consistently present, making them essential in the safeguarding process. Understanding why some children don't—or can't—speak up is key to helping professionals respond better and earlier.

The Bigger Picture

Despite growing efforts to make schools safer and more child-centred, many young people still face serious obstacles when it comes to disclosing abuse. These barriers are complex. Some are deeply personal and emotional, rooted in fear, shame or confusion. Others are structural—linked to how schools operate, the training staff receive, or wider cultural attitudes about authority and trust.

By bringing together the voices of children with the perspectives of professionals who support them, this article draws on current research to explore what gets in the way—and how schools can do more to break down these barriers.

Understanding why children don’t speak out about abuse requires looking at both their lived experiences and the systems designed to protect them. The following key findings draw on a range of studies—including children's self-reports, staff training evaluations, and wider policy analysis.

What Children Say: Barriers to Speaking Out

What Professionals See: Challenges Within the System

By the Numbers: Key Statistics

What Children Are Telling Us

Children don’t withhold disclosures for simple reasons—it’s often the result of layered emotional, social, and developmental factors. Many feel torn: they want help but fear being blamed, not believed, or making things worse. This emotional uncertainty is one of the strongest barriers to disclosure (Augusti & Myhre, 2021).

Sometimes, children don’t even realise what they’ve experienced is abuse. They might see certain behaviours as “normal,” especially if the abuse has gone on for a long time or was downplayed by others (Augusti & Myhre, 2021).

Age plays a role too. Younger children may lack the language or emotional understanding to describe what’s happened to them. As they get older, children become more reflective and more likely to speak up—though even then, it's not guaranteed (van der Ploeg et al., 2022). Gender differences are also evident, with girls being more likely to disclose, possibly due to how society socialises girls to seek support more openly (van der Ploeg et al., 2022).

Interestingly, children tend to prefer speaking to someone they know well—like a friend or a trusted family member—over a professional. This reluctance to talk to teachers, support staff or health workers may come from previous bad experiences, fear of getting someone in trouble, or worries about confidentiality (Augusti & Myhre, 2021).

Mental health plays into this too. Children with high anxiety or strong emotional control might keep things inside, even when they're struggling. On the other hand, those experiencing depression may be more likely to reach out for help, perhaps because their emotional distress becomes harder to manage alone (van der Ploeg et al., 2022).

One surprising finding: children in classrooms with stronger group cohesion were less likely to disclose abuse. In these close-knit environments, children may not want to disrupt group dynamics or risk being judged by peers (van der Ploeg et al., 2022).

What Professionals Are Facing

On the other side, professionals also face hurdles when trying to support disclosure. Many simply haven’t had enough training to confidently identify signs of abuse or respond in the right way. While some interventions have shown promise—boosting both knowledge and attitudes—the overall evidence is still limited (Walsh et al., 2022).

A lack of clarity around what exactly counts as “reportable” abuse can lead to hesitation. Some professionals are unsure whether their concerns are valid, or worry about the consequences of making a referral that turns out to be unsubstantiated (Walsh et al., 2022).

The wider culture of a school matters too. If the focus is mainly on policy compliance or protecting the institution’s reputation, rather than prioritising students’ voices, this can discourage both staff and pupils from speaking openly (Powell et al., 2020).

Even when the will to act is there, structural barriers can get in the way: patchy procedures, inconsistent communication about safeguarding protocols, and unclear pathways for raising concerns all contribute to missed opportunities (Powell et al., 2020).

Finally, social stigma continues to cast a long shadow. Cultural pressures around family reputation, shame, or silence can prevent both children and adults from addressing abuse head-on—especially in marginalised or tight-knit communities (Powell et al., 2020).

Where the Gaps Are

A key tension emerges between how children prefer to share their experiences—informally, and with someone they trust—and how professionals are trained to receive disclosures—formally, through prescribed systems. Unless these systems are built around strong relationships and trust, they’re unlikely to be used effectively.

Although training does help, it isn’t enough on its own. Most studies involve small sample sizes and don’t represent the full range of professionals working with children (Walsh et al., 2022). Meanwhile, the gap between what policy aspires to—safe, responsive school environments—and what young people actually experience remains stark (Powell et al., 2020).

Making Sense of the Findings

This research highlights just how complex the issue of abuse disclosure really is. Children’s silence isn't simply a matter of not wanting to talk—it's shaped by a tangle of emotional, relational, systemic, and cultural factors that all interact with each other.

From the child’s point of view, barriers like fear of not being believed, uncertainty about how adults will react, and a preference for confiding in friends or family instead of professionals are all significant. These challenges are further shaped by age, gender, and mental health—factors that influence not only how children feel, but whether they even recognise what happened to them as abuse.

Professionals face a different set of obstacles. Many report feeling underprepared—unsure about when and how to act, or whether their concerns meet the threshold for reporting. Even when staff want to help, they may be restricted by unclear policies, rigid procedures, or a wider school culture that doesn’t always make room for honest, child-led conversations.

There’s also a worrying gap between what policies promise and what actually happens in schools. The language around creating ‘child safe’ spaces is increasingly visible in safeguarding guidance—but young people’s experiences often reflect a very different reality.

The Role of Culture and Stigma

Wider cultural factors can’t be ignored. In some communities, silence around abuse is maintained by strong expectations around family loyalty, shame, or fear of community judgment. These beliefs can stop both children and professionals from addressing abuse—even when they want to. For schools, this means safeguarding cannot be treated as a one-size-fits-all approach; cultural sensitivity and inclusive practices are essential.

Where More Work Is Needed

While the available research provides a valuable window into the challenges both children and professionals face, some areas remain under-explored:

• Intersectionality: There’s limited research on how factors like race, disability, or language barriers affect disclosure in school settings.
• Impact of Interventions: Few large-scale studies have measured whether training, policy changes, or new safeguarding practices actually increase disclosure rates.
• Real-World Practice: More is needed to understand how school policies are put into action on the ground—what works, what doesn’t, and why.

Key Insights

Children face a wide range of challenges when it comes to speaking up about abuse in school settings. Fear of not being believed, emotional confusion, not recognising their experiences as abuse, and a strong preference for speaking to someone they know and trust—all contribute to delays or complete silence (Augusti & Myhre, 2021; van der Ploeg et al., 2022). Age, gender, and mental health also shape how likely a child is to disclose.

Professionals, meanwhile, often feel under-equipped to respond. Many lack up-to-date training, feel uncertain about when to report, or work within systems that don’t make disclosure easy. Cultural stigma and school environments that prioritise procedure over relationships can further discourage both staff and pupils from addressing abuse (Walsh et al., 2022; Powell et al., 2020).

What This Tells Us

The barriers to abuse disclosure are deeply interwoven. Children are navigating personal fears and social pressures. Professionals are navigating unclear systems and limited resources. Together, these challenges create environments where silence is more likely than safety.

Recommendations for Practice

• Improve Staff Training
  Regular, evidence-informed safeguarding training should be a standard part of school life—not just for designated leads but for all staff (Walsh et al., 2022).
• Build Relationships That Matter
  Safe environments are built on trust. Prioritising genuine, respectful relationships between students and staff can make it easier for children to speak up (Augusti & Myhre, 2021; Powell et al., 2020).
• Make Reporting Clear and Accessible
  Staff and students both need to understand what to do if abuse is suspected or disclosed. This means having well-communicated procedures that feel accessible and non-threatening (Powell et al., 2020).
• Tackle the Stigma Head-On
  Schools should lead the way in challenging the shame and silence that still surrounds abuse. This includes recognising how cultural beliefs and community norms may influence both disclosure and response (Powell et al., 2020).
• Support Informal Confidants
  Since many children turn first to peers or family, schools should provide guidance for these informal supporters—helping them respond in ways that are validating and safe (Augusti & Myhre, 2021).

By addressing these issues at every level—individual, institutional, and cultural—schools can move beyond policy promises and create environments where children feel seen, heard, and supported. Disclosure should never feel like a risk. With the right training, systems, and culture in place, it doesn’t have to be.